if we still talked
It’s not often I find myself missing you. Maybe it’s because of the last thing you said to me. Maybe it’s because of how long it's been since I last saw you and new people have come in to fill the spaces you left. But—and this is what I believe it is—I think I don’t miss you because my life became easier after you were gone. Would that make you sad to hear that? To know that after the initial hurt and confusion I only felt a quiet breath of relief when I realized I wouldn’t ever have to speak to you again? That I could leave the chaos of your world behind? I’ve always heard that the opposite of love is indifference, and I can’t believe how true it is because you rarely cross my mind. That’s how I know I don't miss you. You don't cross my mind except for times like today when I hear a song that hits me a certain way, like a drop of rain on a petal, quiet and weighty, and it makes me feel too many things all at once, and I wonder who to tell. And that's when I remember ...